A guy called out to me, “Excuse me, sir?” and I turned around.
“Yes sir, did you drop this?” he asked, holding out a square of card stock with something printed on it.
Crap, an ad plant.
“Not interested,” I say, not falling for the tired old ploy. I briefly wonder whether anyone falls for it anymore.
“But you haven’t even looked at it."
“Don’t need to. Not interested."
“Do you watch The World of Kevin Minko?
“That show is an assault on good taste and basic human decency."
“Yes,” he says with a smile, "but do you watch it?"
“No,” I lie. I do watch it on occasion. Train wreck appeal, and all that. I turn around and keep walking.
“It’s the most popular show in the world right now,” the ad plant says, following me. “For a reason. Reformed serial killer Kevin Minko sets out to live a normal life. How can you resist that? Do you know who he’s dating now and which fashion trends he’s inspiring?”
“Don’t care.” Then I utter the phrase. The magical phrase that banishes the demon of persuasive conversation from my presence. "Please discontinue your advertising."
“Thank you for your time,” the ad plant says before moving on to the next victim.